I live in New York. I am a comedian, writer and actor. My day job is blogging for VH1.com. I write about the silly things celebrities and pop stars do, so you know...God's work.
You may have seen my writing on many other reputable websites (The Huffington Post, Hello Giggles, xojane.com, The Hairpin, Splitsider, The FW, etc.). I also write crazy blogs about Game of Thrones, Magneto and Jeff Goldblum.
I don't want to talk about anything with you except Star Trek Into Darkness.
Catching Elephant is a theme by Andy Taylor
My cat really does think he’s a human.
Send help! Send a cat whisperer! Send me cash! My cat believes he’s a Christmas present!
I have come home to an apathetic Lucius and a gorgeous Gilda Radner t-shirt.
For those wondering, WonderWanda of FuckYeahGildaRadner made the shirt. I think she still has more in stock. (I also think Tina Fey has one.)
Me: Lucius, last night I went to a fun party!
Lucius: Like I care you got drunk again.
Me: Lucius, I want to change my sheets. Move.
Lucius: You’re going to have to drag me off, bitch!
Me: Lucius, are you worried about the hurricane?
Lucius: Bitch, I’m dreaming of being a bunny rabbit. Shut up.
Me: Hey Lucius, aren’t you happy for me? I’m feeling better, I was cast in a short form improv company and I have a really nice boyfriend.
Lucius: I renounce you and all we’ve shared and will now live on this chair that does not belong to you.
Me: Hey Lucius, I’m back from a ten day vacation. Did you miss me?
Lucius: Explain the reasons why I should fucking care.
Me: Hey Lucius, I’m about to leave for a week and a half. Want to say goodbye?
Lucius: Fuck off.
