August 2011
3 tags
1 tag
My mom is the most positive racist ever.
When I was a little girl I asked my mom why anti-Semitism exists, and her response was, “Well…Jewish people work really hard and are very good with their money. In times of trouble, people blame them because they’re jealous. But that’s not fair, because they work hard. They deserve all the money they make.”
One time we were driving through a downtown neighborhood...
2 tags
3 tags
3 tags
erikonymous replied to your post: Leave the Gizmodo OKCupid girl alone!
It’s not that she doesn’t like Magic. It’s that she projected suspect motives onto him, and wrote about it on the internet (by name!) as if he were doing something wrong. She says that he “infiltrated” dates. She got no class. She is a mean girl.
I’m not saying she’s totally innocent. It’s low classy to air...
3 tags
Leave the Gizmodo OKCupid girl alone!
Oh my god, my nerdy, wonderful and intelligent friends…back the fuck off this girl. If I had gone on a date with someone who’s whole life revolved around their fraternity and college football team—someone who now was on a professional football team—someone who also took them to a creepy one-act play about a murderer—and someone with whom I felt no sexual...
3 tags
Success!
I can’t remember how much I’ve talked about it here, but I created an improv form called “Honey Badger”. It’s basically a montage and the edits use some of the sillier aspects of the Honey Badger viral video. More than that, it’s a cast of improvisers who come from different teams and backgrounds. It’s open to all and the hope is everyone gets out of their...
4 tags
3 tags
1 tag
2 tags
2 tags
I slept away my worries.
So I did all this planning and all this worrying and all this fretting about the Hurricane, and then when I woke up this morning everything was fine. I wish all the problems in my life were like that.
EDIT: I personally was fine. I know not everyone was. I am lucky.
2 tags
6 tags
3 tags
My mom's guide to surviving the hurricane.
My mom is obsessed with the idea of surviving things. She loves books about Native American warrior women, news magazines about surviving assault and made-for-television-movies about pioneers who have to boil leather to survive a winter in Montana. So, when news alerts told her that Hurricane Irene was about to strike the entire East Coast, she wasn’t just alarmed for my safety, she was in...
3 tags
3 tags
My texts today paraphrased.
The guy: I want to see you!
Me: You should come over Saturday night and then stay on Sunday to protect me from looters.
The guy: Uh...sure...maybe...logistics..
Me: They're going to shut down the subway on Saturday at noon.
The guy: Have fun in the storm! Call me!
7 tags
Second City Employee Confesses Rape To UCB Comedy... →
gabydunn:
popculturebrain:
Very rarely do I post something this serious minded but it’s extremely important that it be read by as many people as possible. Also that it came from the presumably forward thinking alternative comedy community is especially of note.
Below are excerpts from the original post by Poupak Sepehri, audience member at the closing Asssscat of the recent UCB Del Close...
4 tags
“Mayor Michael Bloomberg says officials expect to shut down the city’s entire...”
–
New York City Plans Shutdown of All Mass Transit
(via hugparty)
Hey guys…if Bloomberg orders an evac of all of Queens, WHERE AM I SUPPOSED TO GO AND HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET THERE?
This might finally be the time where I get the number of my cousin in the NYPD (he’s a high ranking...
Yesterday I planned on buying rainboots and I...
I AM AN ADULT.
3 tags
My texts today paraphrased.
The guy: Lovey-dovey-puke-words.
Me: The hurricane's going to kill me! I'm going to buy pie filling.
4 tags
The Autobiography of Magneto X in Chinese →
Whoa. A few months ago I got an email from a girl who wanted to translate my Magneto blog into Chinese. Looks like she did…whoa…
2 tags
4 tags
“But in a city like New York, hurricane-force winds could break windows en masse,...”
– According to the International Business Times, I’m going to die. If not in my tall glass walled office building, then drowning in the subway, and if not drowning in the subway, I’m sure the looters will take me in Queens.
2 tags
6 tags
2 tags
“I need to look on the bright side. At least [the people I work for]...”
– file under: texts I sent my boyfriend today after he sent me texts of him lounging poolside on vacation.
3 tags
"You need to watch your envy, Meghan."
A few years ago, my friends and I were joking about which of the seven deadly sins we most suffered from. It was really funny until my friends pointed out that I am possibly the most envious person who’s ever lived. I really hadn’t seen myself like that before, but they were right.
Let’s look at my life now for instance: I hang out with other stand ups and am jealous that they...
4 tags
“Are prosecutors really saying that anyone who has lied on an asylum application...”
– “Why rape victims must have flawless pasts to get justice” by Joan Smith | The Independent
3 tags
That's it. I'm going to write an essay about how...
3 tags
1 tag
How's the weather in NYC today?
I want to make love to it like lovers do.
5 tags
“One Day centers on Dex and Emma, and essentially begins with their graduation...”
– ‘Why One Day is the Most Toxic Romance of the Year’ | Jezebel
I have not seen the film, One Day, but I tried to read the book earlier this year. I couldn’t get past the first few chapters because it felt like I was reading an idealized version of how miserable my (love) life was...
3 tags
1 tag
2 tags
How To Look Good In Every Photograph |... →
About a year and a half ago, I made a promise to myself. I was tired of looking at Facebook photos of myself from parties and zeroing in on all the things I hated about how I looked. So I had the crazy notion one day that I would stop doing that. I challenged myself to play a game called “Find one thing about how you look in this photo that you DO like.”
Join me on my everlasting quest to like...
4 tags
5 tags
4 tags
3 tags
4 tags
1 tag
Anonymous asked: what did you major in?
Is anyone else watching The Hour on BBC America? →
