Ugh, this is still a thing?
Until an hour ago, I had forgotten NYE was a thing. Then I remembered, stopped googling info on Chandler Bing’s transvestite dad (Kathleen Turner!!!) and got the curling iron out. Off to the PIT and then probably the Creek. Oh, my stars and nylon garters.
Back to the scene of the crime...
I’m performing at the PIT tonight at 9:30pm in a super cool show called “True to Form” that’s all about improv forms and I’m going to get a chance to try to find out from the bartenders exactly how many shots of Jameson they gave me last night. The mystery will be solved!
Well, it was my birthday. I feel like if there’s going to be a time when a...– Me to my roommate five minutes ago explaining how I broke the toilet paper dispenser last night. Then I buried my face in a corner and muttered, “I’m so ashamed!”
Infinity Shots of Jameson
I did “infinity shots of Jameson” last night, but I sadly only remember the first two. Or maybe three. Hi, I’m 27 now.
Today, because it is my day of days and that makes me happy no matter what, I’m going to give Hillstone’s another chance. The last time I went there for lunch, I was treated like a second class citizen. However, I am hungry and want to treat myself to a nice meal. Let’s give the assholes another chance, shall we?
robbyattacks asked: What are the differences between the comedy you're writing and the comedy you wish you were writing?
betterfoodandcoolerpeople asked: This is a story about how it's your birthday in England already. It's not a very good story because one of your country's airports held me hostage for like 10 hours yesterday but regardless of that fact, here I am, telling you happy birthday in a 'proper' British accent, which will probably sound Australian when I do it. Have a great day! :)
Hello Giggles Presents: Growing Pains | UCBeast... →
Get your tickets to the first NYC Hello Giggles show! It features these lovely schmucks: Hosted by Marcelle Karp Featuring: Eliza Hurwitz (http://hellogiggles.com/eliza-hurwitz [hellogiggles.com]) Deanna Raphael (http://hellogiggles.com/deanna-raphael [hellogiggles.com]) Jake Fogelnest (http://jakefogelnest.com/ [jakefogelnest.com]) Jennifer...
My plane was delayed three hours, we almost crashed during take off and landing, then I was stuck in a cab for over an hour and a half. I come home and tell my roommate that I had a shitty travel day and she decides it’s the best time to enter my room unannounced as I’m going through my luggage and tell me about her frustrating (and boring) series of phone calls with Bank of America.
Guess which airline is going to receive a strongly worded letter* about its service if they ever actually get me home?!?!? Hint: I mention them frequently on twitter! *I’m talking Herulean words and breath-taking turns of phrase here.
thrivingyoungsoul replied to your post: What do you love most about the year 2011? ooh so, now can you share some of those “weird ideas” ?? :D Oh, I mean, I’ve started doing that in full on this blog and in performance. I’m going to start doing more character based stuff. Just writing and producing “Atheist Carolers” took courage because by it’s very nature...
thecharacterofmediocrity-deacti asked: What do you love most about the year 2011?
kickassbluegrass asked: What's your favorite thing about me?
You can always ask me stuff... →
Absolutely Explosive and Stuff →
Me: So there’s no mass? Colleen: No. I told you this is a Presbyterian church. We don’t do mass. Me: You mean there’s no free food and no free booze? What are we supposed to get in return for our faith? And then my mom slapped me with her services program
Out-of-Office on. Final Christmas shopping commencing.
It is a year when you could have an ear infection & care should be taken at...– I googled “Capricorn 2012 forecast” and this is some of the astrological advice I found.
Basically, I’m going to put on a beautiful dress and get drunk and...– From the ‘My Birthday (Birthday Edition)’ event I just created on Facebook. Let’s find out who my real friends are.
You, dear lady, know how to appreciate your...
One of my bosses just gave me a bag of Lindor truffles and a $500 gift card.
When people ask me why I moved to New York, I always bluntly say, “for comedy”. Really, I moved to New York for sketch comedy. I had been building confidence as a sketch writer and performer in Boston and wanted to be in a place where I could learn from professionals and hopefully become one myself. What I immediately realized upon moving to New York is that producing sketch comedy...
The show finally ended at 4:47 pm when Lorelei threw Chester’s...– Okay, WordPad is open. I’m going to freewrite the first page of this bitch. (It’s a freewrite. Everything I just quoted will probably disappear should I ever finish the story.)
In case you missed it...
WATCH my first sketch with PITtv team Codswallop! (I wrote it!) (It’s also on Funny or Die!) READ my article about Santa Babies. NEVER FORGET.
7 Adorable "Santa Babies" | The FW →
I wrote this. What? I swear I have a social life.
Anonymous asked: You're a national treasure. The nation doesn't know it yet, but they will.
I find that whenever I’m faced with adversity, if I ask myself, “What would Amy Poehler do?”, and then I do that, then I win.
This looks like a cool show | UCBeast Schedule →
My favorite part of getting wasted on the...
Good morning! I’m ready to work. Is everyone else?
How To Make New Friends On The Internet →
livingsitcom: Good article posted today in the always a-ma-zying Hello Giggles. I’ll be a dork and say, yes, it does make me excited to know there are people I’ve never met who like my writing because of Hello Giggles. It’s so cool. And dorky.